I guess me expressing myself has once again been shown to not be the answer. Drama is NOT what it is I'm looking for. I am however, looking for inner peace and to get other's perspectives. Maybe I'm just not as advanced as some with their emotions. I'm ok with saying that. It's been a long time since I took any time to look within myself and really get a good idea of who I am. There's been many things that have kept me from finding out-but really, it's just me being afraid of who or what I may find there.
I feel like sometimes it's easier to not deal with it at all and keep going, but then it ends up numbing to the point where I shut down and am not able to express any feeling at all. Not sure if that makes sense to anyone other than myself, but it is what it is.
It's kind of a survival instinct like those who've had something tragic happen in their lives....they file it away in the "unmentionables" section of their hearts and minds..there it can stay and not be thought about or dealt with...and it comes out at the oddest times, and in the oddest ways.
I'm just trying to do some serious Spring cleaning of my mind, heart and soul...guess I just need to be more tactful in expressing these thoughts. A poem perhaps?? :)
Anyhow-I think I'll leave my thoughts here for tonight and start fresh again in the morning.
Ok, so it's down...
Friday, February 13, 2009
Posted by Ms. Haley at 10:31 PM
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4 comments:
Feel free to express your angst, frustration, irritation, even hatred towards something, some situation, or some one. There is nothing wrong with that. Nothing. What I do mean is this:
No longer lend yourself to that which you wish to be free from.
Make sense?
Love you!
I know-just thought I was being tactful enough as not to draw that kind of energy back to me. I'm trying to get rid of it-not bring it to me. Ya know?
without the darkness we would not appreciate the light - without the pain we would not appreciate the pleasure --- I would personally love to indulge in only the preasure, but the darkness will always be there, jealous and waiting, waiting to steal your joy -- just recognize it for what it is and do not let it control you, but use it to make you stronger...
Always.
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